
When you first imagined becoming a parent, did you think about…potty training? The whole potty process can feel intimidating.
At ParentCo., we’re keeping it real. Join our community of parents for honest, unscripted chat about potty highs, lows, and down belows. We know that, like all things parenting, potty learning goes much smoother when you’re not in it alone.

OUR VILLAGE EXPERT
Allison Jandu
Location: Maryland
Social: @pottytrainingconsultant
As founder of Potty Training Consultant, Allison has created an entire community for parents to come together without judgment, ask the hard questions, and get evidence-based facts that drive potty success.

FAQ
Potty training is a big milestone—for kids and parents. Whether you’re just getting started, hitting roadblocks, or wondering what’s “normal,” these FAQs offer practical answers and reassurance for every step of the journey.
How do I know if my child is ready to start potty training?
Instead of circling a date on the calendar, focus on readiness cues. Some signs your child might be ready: they can stay dry for two hours at a time, they notice (or care!) when their diaper is wet or dirty, they show interest in the toilet or potty, and they can follow simple instructions like “sit down” or “pull up your pants.” Communication is big too—whether that’s telling you “pee!” or doing a very obvious potty dance. Remember, interest comes before consistency. If your child checks a few boxes but not all, that’s fine. Starting gently—maybe just sitting on the potty before bath—can help. This guide is a great resource!
What’s the “right” age to begin, or is it different for every kid?
There’s a wide normal range. Most children start somewhere between 18 months and 3 years, but some are ready earlier and some much later. Pediatricians will tell you that readiness matters more than age. If you start before your child is developmentally ready, it can lead to frustration (and more mess for you). On the flip side, waiting too long can sometimes turn into a power struggle. The sweet spot? When your child shows readiness cues and you have the bandwidth to be consistent for a few weeks.
Should I try pull-ups, underwear, or go cold turkey?
Families do this in all sorts of ways. Some swear by pull-ups for a gentle transition; others find they drag things out. Underwear can work well if you’re home and able to clean up a few messes. Going cold turkey—straight to undies, no looking back—works best for confident kids (and parents who don’t mind a little extra laundry). The truth? There’s no “right” way. Think about your child’s temperament and your family’s tolerance for mess. Whatever you choose, stick with it long enough to see if it works.
How do I handle accidents without making my child feel ashamed?
Accidents are part of learning. Instead of scolding, stay calm and matter-of-fact. A simple, “Oops, that happens. Let’s get cleaned up and try again next time,” does wonders. This teaches your child that mistakes aren’t a big deal and helps protect their confidence. You can even keep a little cleanup kit handy so you’re not flustered. And remember: kids can sense frustration a mile away, so if you need to step out for a deep breath, that’s okay too.
What do I do if my child refuses to sit on the potty?
Pushing will almost always backfire. If your child digs in their heels, it’s usually a sign they’renot quite ready. Keep the potty accessible, let them sit on it fully clothed, read silly potty books, or even let a favorite stuffed animal “practice.” Often, taking the pressure off makes kids curious again. Try a gentle reintroduction in a few weeks—it really can make a world of difference.
Is there a difference between day training and night training?
Yes! Staying dry during the day is about learning a skill; staying dry at night is about physical development. Your child’s bladder and brain need to mature enough to stay dry for 10–12 hours, and that isn’t something you can train. That’s why it’s common for kids to master days first and still need diapers or pull-ups at night for months (or even years). The American Academy of Pediatrics reassures parents this is normal, so take the pressure off nighttime.
How do I help my child poop on the potty (not just pee)?
Pooping can feel scarier for kids. Sometimes it’s about control, sometimes about comfort. A small footstool can help them feel secure and keep their body in the right position (knees above hips). Make sure they’re not constipated—that can make poop withholding worse. A routine helps, too: encourage potty time after meals when the body naturally wants to go. Praise any effort, even just sitting, to build confidence.
My toddler is afraid of flushing—is that normal?
Completely normal. The loud whoosh, the sudden disappearance—it can feel like magic or a monster depending on the day. Don’t force them to flush. Let them step away and flush later, or skip it for now. Many kids warm up if you let them push the handle when they feel ready. If you want to make it fun, a kid-size potty with a gentle “practice flush” (like Ingenuity’s My Size Potty Pro) can help bridge the gap.
How can I potty train when we’re on the go or traveling?
Travel + potty training = extra patience required. Portable potties and folding travel seats are lifesavers. Pack extra clothes, wipes, and leak-proof bags (because accidents in the car are no one’s favorite). Try to keep your child’s potty routine when you can, but give yourself grace: regression on trips is common and temporary. Here’s a helpful article with more tips for keeping your sanity (and your car seat) intact.
What if potty training takes months (or longer) than expected?
That’s totally normal. Some kids train in days; others take months or more. It depends on personality, development, and timing. Progress isn’t always linear, either—good days and rough days are part of the process. The most important things you can offer are consistency, encouragement, and patience. If you feel like you’ve tried everything and nothing’s clicking, it’s always okay to pause and try again later.
How do I handle regressions, especially after big life changes?
Regression happens—especially during transitions like a new sibling, moving, or starting school. Kids use the potty less reliably, or ask for diapers again. Don’t panic. Go back to basics: remind, encourage, and keep a predictable routine. Offer extra reassurance—sometimes kids need emotional support as much as potty practice. With patience, most kids bounce back quickly.
Do boys and girls potty train differently?
On average, girls may show readiness a bit earlier than boys, but the range is wide. What really matters is your child’s unique readiness cues. Gender shouldn’t set expectations. Some boys potty train quickly, some girls take their time. Focus on your child, not the averages.
Should I use rewards like stickers or candy?
Rewards can be a great motivator for some kids. Sticker charts, stamps, or even small treats can add fun. But not all kids need them—many respond well to enthusiastic praise or a little celebration dance. If you do use rewards, keep them small, consistent, and focused on effort (like sitting on the potty), not just success. Over time, the goal is to fade rewards and let pride in independence take over.
My child was doing great, but now refuses the potty—what’s up?
This happens more often than you’d think. Potty use can become a power struggle or get derailed by stress. Step back, avoid turning it into a battle, and reassure your child that it’s okay to take a break. Keeping the potty available and pressure low usually helps them return on their own. Think of it as a detour, not a failure.
How do I talk to daycare or preschool about keeping things consistent?
Communication is everything. Let teachers know your child’s progress, cues, and what language you use at home (“potty” vs. “toilet”). Ask about their routine so you can mirror it at home. Most teachers are very experienced with potty learners and will help keep things consistent. A quick check-in at pickup can smooth bumps along the way.