Bringing a newborn home is one of the most magical experiences of parenthood and also one of the most sleep-deprived periods a parent will ever face, and it is completely normal to feel overwhelmed. Between the round-the-clock feedings, the endless diaper changes, and the mystery of why your baby seems to have their days and nights completely mixed up, sleep can feel like a distant memory. But here's the good news: By the end of this blog post, you will have 5 actionable tips to help your newborn sleep better, and you will feel more confident doing it.
Tip #1: How is a Newborn’s Sleep Different & Realistic Expectations
During the first 3 months of life, newborns sleep in two stages. They spend 50% of the time in REM sleep (active sleep) and the other 50% of the time in NREM (quiet sleep). This is the only period of their life when this happens, as they are rapidly growing and developing. Newborns have not yet developed a circadian rhythm, which can make you feel like sleep is often sporadic, with days and nights flipped, and minimal consistency in their schedule.
Around three to four months, your baby's sleep changes. Their brain is maturing, and they begin cycling through four stages of sleep, just like adults do. This is often when parents notice their baby suddenly waking more at night, even if sleep seemed to be improving. It can feel like a step backward, but it is actually a sign that your baby's brain is developing exactly as it should.
Newborns (0-3 months) should sleep between 14 & 17 hours/day, according to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine. Newborns are often awake only 45-60 minutes between sleep before they are ready to doze off again. They sleep quite a lot, and when they are not sleeping, they are often eating from the breast or bottle to meet their daily intake needs for optimal growth.
Babies need 24-32 ounces (about 700-950 ml) in 24 hours for optimal growth. However, their bellies are the size of a walnut when they are first born, then move to the size of an egg, then orange, etc., as they progress through the first year. As their capacity grows, so too does their sleep duration. This is something many parents don’t realize, so tracking intake from a bottle or using a baby scale to perform weighted transfers, especially when nursing, can be a helpful tool for new parents.
Tip #2: Create a Sleep-Friendly Environment
Most people don’t go to Las Vegas and sleep with the curtains open, right? Creating an environment that is calm, cool, and dark will help the baby sleep more soundly and comfortably. Let me share a few key points with you to build your own sleep oasis.
- Dark is best: Blackout curtains and dim lights signal sleep, especially as their circadian rhythms develop.
- White Noise: Womb-like sounds of shushing, rain, or static can be a helpful tool in eliminating exterior noise, both in the house or when out on the go. Sound machines are most effective when set between 50 and 60 decibels, about as loud as a quiet conversation or a running shower, creating a consistent, soothing backdrop for sleep without being too stimulating or too faint.
- Temperature: Ideally, a sleep environment should be between 68 & 72 degrees F for safe and comfortable sleep. Dressing a baby is important as well, based on your location, the time of year, and the TOG rating of the swaddle you might choose to use.
- Safe Sleep Always: Babies should always be placed on their back, on a firm, flat surface with nothing in the sleep space.
Tip #3: Create a Simple Routine
The word routine, in the chaos of the newborn phase, can feel a bit like an oxymoron. It’s not about rigid schedules at this age; it’s about predictable cues and the right tools to set up your newborn for sleep success.
You hear many parenting experts talking about “eat, play, sleep,” which was designed to help you feed after they wake, when ideally they are rested and ready to eat well, but also, to avoid always feeding ‘to sleep’ which can later become a sleep association that you need to break as sleep patterns mature in the first year of life.
Sleep routines are helpful to signal to the baby that sleep is coming, so perhaps it’s eating if it’s time, a warm washcloth to the face, a diaper change, then calm rocking for a few minutes before placing the baby down to sleep in the crib or bassinet.
Tip #4: Understanding Timing, Overtired & Sleep Cues
Overtiredness is the most common reason people see sleep problems in little ones of all ages. A newborn who is too tired is harder to settle, often won’t eat well, and won’t stay asleep. The wake windows for the first 3 months of life are short, 45-90 minutes between sleep. It’s not about a perfect “schedule” at this age, but more about protecting overtired.
From the moment babies wake, they begin building adenosine, a neurotransmitter that steadily accumulates during wakefulness to create what is known as sleep pressure. When a baby is put to sleep at the right time, adenosine levels are high, they drift off easily, and tend to stay asleep for a good stretch. However, when that window is missed, and sleep pressure builds too high, the body responds by releasing cortisol and adrenaline as a stress response, creating the dreaded 'second wind,' where an exhausted baby suddenly appears hyperactive or intensely cranky rather than sleepy.
This is why catching tired cues early, such as staring off into space, yawning, or the onset of fussiness, is so important. Acting on those early signals, before overtiredness sets in, can make the difference between a baby who drifts off with ease and one who fights sleep despite desperately needing it.
Tip #5: Take Care of YOU
You can’t pour from an empty cup; parental exhaustion is real and valid. “Sleep when the baby sleeps” isn’t always possible or realistic.
One thing that worked well for us was the introduction of a dream feed. I would go to sleep right after the baby went down, then go to sleep. My husband would then stay awake until 10 pm, wake them and offer them a full feed of expressed milk or formula, from the bottle. I would then handle the next wakings, which were often around 1 or 2 am, which allowed me to get a solid chunk of sleep from 8 pm until then, and my husband could sleep from 11 pm until he got up for work. This worked for us, so that we were both balancing the sleep deprivation that comes with a new one.
Lower the bar, it’s progress, not perfection. Fed is best, laundry can wait. Reaching out for support from family and friends, asking for help if mentally you are struggling, and giving yourself grace are important. Control what you can control, and the rest will come together. The newborn phase is temporary, and with the right knowledge and tools, it gets easier.
If you're in the thick of the newborn haze and wondering if sleep will ever feel manageable again, you don't have to figure it out alone. Courtney Zentz and the Tiny Transitions team are here to help you build the knowledge and confidence you need to support healthy sleep from the very start. Reach out today to connect with a sleep consultant who truly understands what you're going through, because every family deserves more rest.
